misheard

An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years.
Upon her return, her father cussed her. "Where have ye been all this
time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call?
Can ye not understand what ye put yer old mum thru?
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....dad....I became a
prostitute...."
Ye what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a
disgrace to this family."
OK, dad-- as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious
Fur coat, title deed to a ten-bedroom mansion plus a savings certificate
For $5 million. For me little brother, this gold Rolex and for ye
daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible
that's parked outside plus a membership in the country club ... (takes a
breath)... and an invitation for ye all to spend New Years Eve on board
me new yacht in the Riviera, and...."
Now what was it ye said ye had become?" says dad.
Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff ... a prostitute dad! Sniff,sniff."
Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye
said a Protestant'. Come here and give yer old man a hug!"

:icon_cheesygrin: