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Now this is what's called a good wife

london_boy
06-22-07, 12:38 PM
A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although

very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with

his old buddies.



So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."



Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.



"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face. I'm going to have a beer."



The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the

refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12

different countries: Germany , Holland , Japan , India , etc.



The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could

think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop...but at the bar...you know...they

have frozen glasses... "



He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him

by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?"

She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was

getting chills just holding it.



The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the

bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...I won't

be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"



"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie h?" She opened the oven and took

out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in

blankets,

mushroom caps, and pork strips.



"But my sweet honey...at the bar....you know there's swearing, dirty

words and all that..."



"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? ....."LISTEN UP D*CKHEAD! SIT DOWN,

SHUT THE F*CK UP, DRINK YOUR DAMN BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG, AND

EAT YOUR F*CKIN' HORS D'OEUVRES. BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING

TO

A

F*CKIN' BAR! THAT SH*IT IS OVER...GOT IT, AS*HOLE?"



..and, they lived, more or less, happily ever after.

:welcome:

beast
06-22-07, 02:47 PM
:lol: That's Comedy, and is probably true for most folks...

th3n00b
06-22-07, 03:38 PM
Nah, after three weeks she can't wait to get your dirty smell ass off to the bar if nothing else just to keep your fat greasy carcase off of her. And on the rare chance that she does let you roll on top of her for 40 seconds of desperate, bloaty grunting, she'll be sure and make a point of using the biggest vibrator possible to finish herself off in order to highlight your innadequacy. But you won't care because in the time it takes for you to roll off her and your 4 inches of power shrivels back up into your taint, you're fast asleep, snoring like your trying to scare off a bear.

tamsnod27
06-22-07, 03:44 PM
What a beautiful picture you paint, there th3n00b!

th3n00b
06-22-07, 03:49 PM
I'm just kidding, it's not really like that at all.

*cries silently to self*

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